Monday, March 19, 2012

Between a Rock & a Hard Place…I Have to Tell Him…

Over the weekend during St. Patty’s Day shenanigans in the city, CJ’s best friend Sean’s girlfriend revealed to me that she is not exactly happy w/ her current relationship. I’ve been thinking that there was something off w/ her for at least a month or so and I guess she needed a few drinks to finally tell the truth. 

CJ’s best friend and she have been bickering lately and all through St. Patty’s day they didn’t take one picture together. We took pictures of her, and she took a pic of him, meanwhile she took a picture of CJ & me without blinking an eye. None of them together. It was odd & when we went out of the bar for her to have a cigarette she admitted to me she didn’t know what to do about her unhappiness because Sean doesn’t seem to have a clue about it. She is not a malicious person, so she doesn’t want to blindside with this information, but I don’t believe in staying in a relationship if your not happy, BUT I do believe on trying to work things out. She doesn’t know if working on it will help…

She loves Sean w/ all her heart, and they have been dating now 2 years, but she feels like he doesn’t even know her anymore. That is not good. I asked her if she has tried to talk to him about this, and she says she’s afraid to because she doesn’t want to hurt him, but…if you don’t speak up and be honest w/ him of course things are going to be messed up. I don’t know all the details but she really did drop this on me suddenly and I’m not sure what to do now…She never said don't tell CJ...

CJ is my boyfriend and Sean is his best friend, I feel like I should tell CJ what Sean’s girlfriend told me but I don’t know if it is my place to tell. I don’t want to see Sean get hurt, but I think him and his girlfriend deserve to be happy. Maybe if I tell CJ to tell Sean to talk to her about their relationship, perhaps it would be a step in the right direction for them to figure themselves out…or it could backfire and I’d lose her as a friend and things could get awkward for all of us. I just don’t know, but it feels like information I should tell CJ. It’s important, ending or working on a relationship of two years. 

I told her maybe they should try dating again; see if the spark is even still there. I also told her to tell Sean that she is going to have a really busy week and just needs some time to herself to relax a bit, so she can pull herself together and see what she wants to do. Maybe I should give her a lil time before I tell CJ…Ahhh…I don’t know what to do…

Would you tell your Boyfriend/Girlfriend if you found out their Best Friend’s Relationship maybe having problems??

 I would love to hear…


  1. yikes. tough spot. At the end of the day - Sean will be around longer than this girl, it seems. So, I'd be vague and say to CJ - GF said some interesting things the other day, I don't want to get in the middle, but sounds like her and Sean have some stuff to work on. And see how that goes w/ CJ. He might not want to hear, and that gets you out of the position where you're the only one w /the info.

  2. I agree with k.mead 100%.

    Sorry you have to go through this.

  3. Wish I had a friend like you to look out for my relationship!
    I would tell CJ and tell him the decision is his to say something or not- but if he does he should make it seem like this is based on your observation and concern for them...and that is it. It's up to CJ's friend from there.

  4. I think you gave the right advice, and you should let them figure it out. When my fiance's best friend was having issues in his relationship, we talked about it, but it's all up to those two and how they deal with it because it's their relationship. Honestly, if she's not willing to talk to him herself, and has been feeling this way for a month, that's on her.

  5. Wow...It's not an easy situation. This girlfriend has not been very thoughtful as she put you in this very uncomfortable position. I think that you should definitely mention it to your boyfriend, but just not to try to fix it, because it's not your business, but just to share with him your concern and take some pressure off your chest. Good luck! The other girls have given you great advices as well! xoxo

  6. Ooh that's a tough place to be in! If I were you, I'd tell my boyfriend. You have more allegiance to your boyfriend than you do to her, and then make your boyfriend decide if he wants to tell his friend! Good luck with that one!

  7. I'm not sure what I would do, but it must be a horrid position to be in! I don't envy you.

  8. i would tell my boyfriend and let him decide what to do from there. your loyalty lies to him... but ultimately, if she is so unhappy... she should work it out with him.

    bad place to be in... but better to underspeak than overspeak!