I have a problem of holding grudges. It's a weakness of mine, but eventually the grudge boils out and I hash it out with whom ever it is. There has been a burning resentment inside of me for someone who went into my life quickly and when she departed created a firestorm of issues for me in a particular area of my life that is even taboo to write about here because what if my blog gets into the wrong hands. *hint hint*. But from the lack of knowledge and specifics I wasn't told clear enough, there is a sea of problems that I'm drowning deeply in. I've been taking it all w/ a grain a salt and trying to hold back my tears, resentment, but the problem is I can't hash it out w/ the appropriate people so it is building and building.
I am generally a very nice person. I would give you the coat off my back if it called for it. But I have to push all of that aside and speak up. There are bullies in this world and I have definitely found more than my fair share of them. From friends, to work colleagues, to jackasses at a bar. There is an unnecessary bully in my life and I have to take some action about it. I have to be confident and speak my mind and not let someone talk down to me. I spoke to my boyfriend's Mom today about this because she happened to be there at the right moment and she gave me a few tips about speaking up properly. I needed her today and it made her a lil cooler.
For now tho, I am going to enjoy my few moments of relaxation. I have a rosemary focaccia bread loaf and some tomato soup w/ a ripe mango ready for lunch. I rented Young Adult which I'm really looking forward to watching because it was filmed in my hometown. Yes the movie is in Wisconsin or Minnesota but it was actually filmed less than a half hour from Manhattan. Go figure? lol. Tonight is one of CJ's friend's birthday parties so it should be a blast! Here's hoping...