Every relationship has arguments, hell even screaming matches, and it is inevitable. I really believe that it isn't a problem that a couple fights because sometimes that's how things need to be worked out and a compromise or decision will have to be made. BUT what the true test of it all is how to handle the fact that you just fought w/ your significant other.
CJ and I had a big fight on Saturday night. It was over something really stupid & what didn't help matters was that I was stone cold sober and he was not. Also the fact that boys will be boys and girls have limits of toleration. When everything simmered down and the realization that we do care about each other & love each other too much to fight over nonsense so we eventually went to bed in each other's arms.
I have to admit tho, that I'm still a lil mad... I'm not mad at the stupid situation I got lodged into, I'm mad that CJ's argument was that it's human nature for a man to act like a man as well as every woman will somehow act the same as every other woman. I don't think that's true at all. Yeah there are patterns of similar behavior between men & women, but isn't the whole point of our modern age is to be your own unique self & defy the norm? He did see my point & some events got cleared up the next day of what actually happened but his human nature defense drove me crazy.
The fight wasn't that big of deal and it got blown out of proportion. A series of unfortunate events also I think set us both off too. I really think I have to just let the whole thing go... It got all straighten out sort of. CJ & I fight so rarely & this stupidity is no reason to put a strain on our relationship. I think what he said was really within the heat of the argument and I really have to just let it slide off. It's not worth the aggravation. He hugged me and said he loved me too much for all this garbage. I love him too much too for this crap.
Grr fights...I hate them...especially this close to Valentine's Day. The fight it over and I will let it go...
How do you handle fights within your relationship? Have you ever had to let it go to keep the peace?
Fortunately Sandy and I are rarely in a pissy mood at the same time but regardless, when we feel ourselves getting aggravated about something stupid we just spend time apart until we simmer down. If it's something significant we'll hash it out but more often than not it isn't worth fighting about.
ReplyDeleteMy husband is the peacemaker. He does what it takes to make sure our disagreements don't escalate. However, when he DOES get mad, I know it's for real, and I take heed.
ReplyDeleteI almost always let things go because I hate fighting. Not that I'm in a relationship to HAVE to let things go.
ReplyDeleteI get you on what you say about all men not always acting the same and likewise for women. My most recent ex is really like a girl in a lot of ways - always overthinking everything (more than even I do). He thought himself out of the relationship and then was the one who cried when we broke up. I've never known a guy to act like that. Then again, maybe that's how Finnish men act and maybe it's normal to them. Who knows. My point anyway is that I agree with you on that.
I hate hate hate fights, probably because of how my mum use to fight with my dad. She'd pick a fight about anything tiny but then it would just blow and blow from there to cover every little thing he'd done wrong since the last argument. Then she'd blank him for days. And I just hate that, its not healthy to have that kind of argument in my view. Luckily we don't ever get that grumpy with each other, we both stop before it gets that bad. Luckily.
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