An old saying is "Home is wherever I'm with you", well I'm starting to learn that it is totally true. CJ's & mine's vision of home is blurring & combing a lil more each day.
My main stolen moment this weekend was between CJ & me on the phone. No one to hear but me, CJ told me he was going to go home. He then added, "By home, I meant your place Mel." My Mom was driving and caught notice of my toothy smile at his awesome words and when I was done w/ his call she said to me, "Wow look at the two of you chatting away like lil school kids in love. What did he say?"
I answered, "Everything I've always wanted to hear and more..."
I've been trying to block out the past relationships from my head for some time now, but resistance is futile. I can't have a spotless mind because then I wouldn't be who & where I am right now. CJ taught me that lil fact. If certain incidents hadn't happened, his sweet words would still have been cute but perhaps they wouldn't have mean as much to me.
My ex-bestfriend-sometimeslover turned about to be a waste of time for me, even the bare minimum friendship. He played such wicked games that I still to this day cannot wrap my head around. One thing that still boggles my mind is when him and I used to come home from an event or just a long hang-out he would say, "Let's go home." I knew he meant universal home like he would drop me off at my place and then he'd go to his house. But then he would pass my exit like as if he were just going to his house. I would have to remind him of what he was doing and where he was going. He would then say, "Oh right you, shit I forgot." Did I not mean enough to him that he didn't realize I was sitting in the car next to him or was he just an idiot and forgot I wasn't his girlfriend and didn't live with him. He pulled this odd stunt on more than occasion...I will never understand why he used to do that...laziness probably...
In an backwards fucked up kinda way I'm glad that happened back in the day. It makes CJ's words today mean the world to me and so so much more. In this case, the grass was definitely greener on the other side. It makes me see how truly lucky I am to have CJ and I can really see what love really is, not just a silly crush.
With CJ & I moving in together something new also came up as a possible issue...However it has nothing to do w/ us & our relationship. I thought had grazed my mind but this weekend it became really apparent. I'll talk about it more later in the week. For now, see you tomorrow...
What were your Weekend Stolen Moments?
How touching. :)
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I think its true, all the idiots and things that often hurt us in the past makes us appreciate and love all the more the people that come into our lives now and light it up. I know the things that have hurt me in the past make me realize just how lucky I am now.
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